the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
it's like heaven, but drunker
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
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