I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
