Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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