I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
