Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
