"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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