lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Farmville is her only friend.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
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