we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
