i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
