she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
