Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize