i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
