i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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