dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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