What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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