my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
