you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
should my penis look like a turkey
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
