I think I won the penis lottery.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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