I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
