i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
