I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Randomize
