Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
