I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
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