she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
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