Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
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