i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
