Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Randomize
