he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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