My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize