So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Don't make out with my wife yet
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I have peed in a lot of sinks
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
i out mim tonsoeep
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