The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
