Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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