You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
