my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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