You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
