awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Small penises have feelings too.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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