You work out of a Hotel?
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
