My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize