They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
