After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
