i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Randomize
