marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I faked an abortion last night.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
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