i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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