Sry I called you an 8
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
