dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
