is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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