New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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