i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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