The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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