Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
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