I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
even my farts smell like vagina
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Randomize
